ISTJ - Personal Relationship

The Traditionalists

Parenthood

ISTJs are very family-oriented and take their responsibilities as parents very seriously. Ultimately, they want their children to grow up to be responsible and hard-working adults like themselves. ISTJs’ home environment is very organized, and their children are expected to follow the rules. They expect their children to help with chores around the house and do their best academically.

As much as they want their children to develop a sense of responsibility, ISTJs also want their children to develop strong ideals and values. They always do their best to instill their own values and sense of responsibility in their children. Their hope is that their children will become strong-willed adults who stand up for what they believe in.

Romantic Relationships

ISTJs value their romantic relationships highly, and are looking for a long-term commitment. They want a partner whom they can find stability and security in—any partner who is unpredictable is not well-suited for an ISTJ. ISTJs will do whatever it takes to help their relationships succeed, and will put a tremendous amount of time and effort towards developing a deep, meaningful bond with their significant other.

ISTJs may have trouble being in-tune with their partner’s emotions. If their romantic partner is an “F” (feeling) personality type, this can be especially problematic. To overcome this, the F type partner must express their emotions directly with their ISTJ partner, rather than just holding them inside.

Friendships

To an ISTJ, friends are secondary to their family. ISTJs generally seek out friends who are like themselves — someone who is dependable and smart, and shares the same interests and values as themselves. Their friendships centers around trust and loyalty. Friends of ISTJs never have to worry about an ISTJ betraying them.

ISTJs are very aware of their own and others’ social status. They are drawn to others who are well-liked, successful, and respected. However, ISTJs heightened awareness of social status can sometimes become overly-concerned with their social status. They may become preoccupied with getting others to like them.

My alone feels so good. I’ll only have you if you're sweeter than my solitude.
Warsan Shire