ESFJs often seek out the opinions of others, but may have a hard time accepting criticism. They may become reliant on others’ approval to validate their self-worth. Others may view ESFJs as overly-sensitive and emotional.
ESFJs enjoy helping others, but for some ESFJs, this may translate into trying to change others. ESFJs must always remind themselves they can’t help everyone — they can only help people who want their help. This tendency may become particularly troublesome for ESFJs’ romantic relationships. They may initially enter into a romantic relationship wanting to help someone change, but may become frustrated when their romantic partner can’t change.
ESFJs strongly held values, coupled with their responsible nature, gives them the drive to work hard and meet their obligations. However, ESFJs must always be aware of what the driving force is behind these obligations. Oftentimes, ESFJs can feel obligation from social expectations, rather than an internal desire to change the world. They must not fall into a routine of helping others at a cost to themselves and their own wellbeing.
ESFJs’ strong desire to “belong” means they may be overly concerned about their social status. They may become preoccupied with how others’ see them, and this can potentially be damaging to their self-esteem and character. It is critical that ESFJs take time to think about their own needs and desires, rather than the needs and desires others have for them.